Tuesday, October 4, 2016

For a Woman I know

Bismillah ir Rahrnan ir Rahim.

FOR A WOMAN I KNOW by -Rufus West a/k/a Muslim Manse Lutalo lyapo 8/31 /16
The following is an excerpt from my letter to a family member.
1 am saddened to hear that you're experiencing abusive relationships Every woman deserves a man, just like every man deserves a woman. When it comes to relationships, men and women deserve the companions they settle for. It all starts with what do we define a man or woman as. Social norms have duped most of us into believing that their definition of a man and a woman is unquestionable. Consequently, we don't question it and suffer the consequences So, I'm asking you,( ), are you a woman, if so, what &/or. How are you a woman? If you have to think long and hard on these questions, then maybe you need to proceed solo until you're ready for an intimate companion to share your space with. It always pains my heart when people in relationships abuse each other. Naturally, it is more painful when the abuse is my [family member]. Unfortunately, however, I am unable to make you change what is in your heart until you not only decide to change -what is in your heart - but also act aggressively to make that change a reality. I believe it all begins with Allah (God) and your relationship with Him. [Name], His Love is Perfect. His Love for you teaches-and shows you how to have love for yourself. How to love yourself. Consequently, that love will penetrate your heart and exterminate all of the toxins therein, which will in turn manifest itself in how you not only treat yourself but also how you allow others to treat you.-Based on what you've told me, you haven't had any examples to guide you to reaching an understanding of self love, at least not any healthy examples. You don't need a companion at the expense of him abusing you. You need to love yourself enough to be without a companion until you are secure of what and who you are, which-will then enable you to be patient- when it comes to -allowing a companion in your life.

My beloved (family member), everythinq I'm telling you is from my life's experience. Hurt people hurt people. I was born male. For the next 30-something years I stayed stuck in a boyhood mentality. Turning 18 only introduced me to adulthood - not manhood.. And even though I can say with confidence that for some time now I’ve been stable in my manhood, I recognize that it's not something that is obtained and then one has it for the rest of his life. No! See, manhood is a state of being that is being challenged every single day in a myriad of ways.

I can't emphasize enough the immense level of responsibility that comes with being a man. Sometimes I still feel the urge to relapse into boyhood and do something irresponsible. It's only by the Grace of Allah that I don't act out my urges and get back in my lane. And if I do happen to act on an urge, I repent and ask for Allah's forgiveness. I'm a work in progress. Al-Hamdulillah (All Praise belongs to and is due to Allah) for me being able to reach the state of manhood (albeit after 30-something years), because it’s like a whole new world just opened up to me. Not only did I learn how to love myself as Allah wanted me to, it -also taught me how to love everyone else. My love and appreciation for the woman in general rose to a level that's beyond words. The woman is the womb of humanity. Without the woman --humanity could -not exist-. If all of the women died today humanity would not be able to reproduce or produce any further civilizations. Man is unable to do this.
Knowing this is a reality, not a theory, it's man's responsibility to value the woman as worthy as his equal, worthy of his love, protection and respect. This is the mindset of a man. He doesn't call her by offensive names or bring harm to her. Knowing what 1 know, I have no desire to be with anyone other than a female who has reached womanhood. Otherwise, I’d rather be (and have been for about two decades now)without a companion. Likewise, I would hope and pray that you’ll do the same thing, Insha Allah, because I hate when you’re in pain.

Rufus West 225213a/k/a Muslim Mansa Lutalo Iyapo: GBCI PO Box 19033;Green Bay, WI 54307